Quality and Quantity - The Thoughts of a 74 Year Old

I am a 74 year old Christian child of God. What is a Christian? I believe the best definition of a "Christian" is the apostle Paul's description of himself given in my favorite verse of the Bible – Galatians 2:20:
I am crucified with Christ – nevertheless I live. Yet not I, but Christ lives in me. And the life that I live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me.

Ever since I rediscovered the concept of this verse and its application to my life, I have tried to live by trusting in Christ within me. It has been a day to day, week to week, year to year process. On many, many occasions, I have slipped up and neglected the recognition of my internal union with Christ and have sinned – that is, I have attempted to do something in my own way and strength.

Every time I have sinned, my heavenly Father has allowed the consequences of my sin to spank me or correct me back to the understanding of who I am IN CHRIST. After all, I am IN His Family and that is what any good father would do to help a child grow.

And I HAVE grown. I have seen the ideal life-style of God's Family and have, to a gradual extent, made that MY life-style. I have been able to grow to whatever extent that I have because I understand that my Father will not reject me – EVER. He will correct me as I need it, but He will not punish me with rejection! (See Romans 8:35-39: Who or what can separate us from the love of Christ? Nobody or nothing can!)

Now let's get into the physical aspects of this body of mine which contains the Spirit of Christ indwelling. I have had a basically good physical life. I have raised four children and seen them grow into considerate, caring adults. I have helped to raise three grandchildren and taken pleasure in seeing them flash through those early years.

Medically, I have always attempted to prolong both the quality and the quantity of my physical life. I have exercised regularly. I have tried to avoid doing things to my body which would be harmful. I smoked in my early years but quit cold-turkey in the 60's when the Surgeon-General first put out warnings. Alcohol consumption has never been a problem. In other words, I wanted both quality and quantity of life in order to live the "good" life with my family and friends.

I became a dentist as a profession. I believe that I helped others to maintain their quality of life by keeping their teeth in good shape or replacing their teeth when necessary. I even, to a lesser extent, affected their quantity of life by treating life-threatening infections of the mouth.

Now I have made it to 74 years old. I still very much want the QUALITY of life. I am on medications to preserve that quality of life: ACE inhibitors and beta-blockers for high blood pressure and vascular health; and cholesterol lowering medication to prevent artery blocking.

Just as Paul's Galatians 2:20 has been my battle cry up until now, I now must question the quantity of life aspect as Paul did in his last writings in 2 Timothy 4:6-8:
For I am now ready to be offered and the time of my departure is at hand. I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day; and not to me only, but to all those also who love His appearing.

These thoughts all recently came to a head with me when my doctor suggested I have a sigmoidoscopy or a colonoscopy to check for cancer of the large intestine. I have had no symptoms and nothing to indicate a problem but this was to be a "routine" checkup procedure. I told the doctor I would consider it.

After some prayer and meditation, here is what I have come up with: I CAN DO WITHOUT THIS PROCEDURE! I reasoned: What would I do if cancer WAS found by this procedure? I have decided I would do nothing! So why have it done? I reason that I have lived a full three-score and ten. I am in the twilight of my life. I am beginning, as Paul did, to long for my Spirit Life in heaven with my Father.

Something has to cause my death. I am ready and prepared for my death. So why search within my body for the agent of my death? I want to continue my quality of life for as long as possible. BUT I NO LONGER WANT TO PROLONG MY QUANTITY OF LIFE AS I DID IN MY EARLIER YEARS.

Is this such a crazy idea? Paul didn't think so. Paul would never have taken his own life and neither would I. But Paul knew and understood what had been accomplished, although imperfectly, through his life in union with Christ. Paul had to die sometime by some unknown means. He knew this and even began to long for its accomplishment. Paul is MY mentor and I understand his thoughts.

I'm sure Paul would have put it in my terms as a 74 year old: He worked in his later years for quality of life but not quantity of life.

My father lived a physical quality of life. He died at 70 years old on a golf course. He had just hit his drive off the tee and one of the group said, "Great shot, Doc!" He turned around, looked at that person, and collapsed and died of a heart attack. What a way to go!

You may say, "Well what if you get cancer and have a painful end to your life? That's not quality!"

I believe in medications for quality of life. And I believe in pain-killing medications, heavy if necessary, to prolong the quality of life in deadly situations. But at 74 years old, I, as Paul was, am resigned to death. I know that something has to get me.

I will continue whatever medications are necessary for quality of life but I renounce surgery, chemotherapy and radiation as treatment for any life-threatening condition.

After all, I have been growing daily in TRUST for the indwelling Christ to carry me through any situation – His strength in my weakness. WHY CHANGE NOW? I know that He will strengthen me in quality of life as He deems necessary. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says:
God is faithful. He will not allow you to have a trial harder than you are able to endure. But with the trial will also make a way of escape so that you may be able to bear it.

As with Paul, the twilight years bring less reliance on QUANTITY of life understanding that there is no better QUALITY of life than to be a child in the Family of God with all the blessings of a divine nature as says 2 Peter 1:3-4:
God's divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him that has called us to glory and virtue – whereby are given to us exceedingly great and precious promises: that you may be partakers of THE DIVINE NATURE having escaped the corruption that is in the world.


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